A Belated Movie Review Of Friday the 13th

It's Halloween and to celebrate I've been DVR'ing every horror movie I can find. I just love a scary movie. And no one scares easier than I do, just ask my family. I was particularly pleased when I found out I'd recorded Friday the 13th. It was originally released in 1980 and in all this time I'd never seen it. So, I sat down with my son and started the movie with much anticipation of slasher movie magic. Dang, I think I was 30 years too late!

When Friday the 13th hit the theaters in 1980 it grossed $39 million and when you adjust that figure for inflation you get...well...a lot more money. I was too young to watch it then, but I heard all about just how scary and brutal it was. Movie critics hated it and social critics hated it even more. One thought the movie would usher in all sorts of depravity. While I fully expected the end of decent society as a result of this movie's existence I couldn't hardly wait until I was old enough to see what all the fuss was about. Well, I guess I didn't make it a big priority because it took me nearly 30 years to finally put eyeballs on it. So, imagine my surprise when I found out it just isn't that scary. Again, dang!

Here's a brief synopsis for anybody who's not seen the movie; young camp counselors with high libidos get killed by a lunatic. I think that covers it. I found my son and me laughing at more stuff than jumping at stuff. Here's some of the things that warranted a snicker from us:

• All the guys wearing short-shorts
• the fact Kevin Bacon was in it
• every time the lunatic showed up, the theme music had someone singing, "ch,ch,ch,ch-ha,ha,ha,ha"
• Jason's mom saying, "Kill her mommy, kill her." Then answering, "I will Jason, I will".
• One of the characters looked like a blond Freddie Mercury in, you guessed it, short-shorts
  

Now, I do think that the movie gets a little more chilling after the scene where Bacon has a conjugal exchange with one of the lady counselors. The last scene where Jason leaps from the water and grabs the sole survivor is truly a great scary moment! Still, the movie pretty much gets a yawn from my son and me.

A side note here; paraskevidekatriaphobia is the fear of Friday the 13th. Say that three times fast! (Actually, pronounce it correctly once and I'll be impressed.) As many as 21 million in the U.S. suffer with paraskevidekatriaphobia and it's estimated that as much as $900 million in business is lost because these folks won't leave their houses. Wow. I wish I knew why Friday the 13th is any different than Thursday the 12th. Hm... I wonder, do they make a pill for paraskevidekatriaphobia?

Well, at least I've got some good movies to watch; the greatest and first slasher, Halloween, Psycho, The Omen, The Shining, some Sponge Bob. The night won't be a total waste. And I'm glad I watched it so that I can say, "I've watched it". Maybe if I would have seen it 30 years earlier it would have been scarier. But, then again...